Sulking? Ok, Maybe I Am...

This post is a bit miserable, please don't read it unless you don't mind someone offloading their miserableness! Just skip to the vaguely amusing photos at the end if you don't fancy reading it. Normal service will resume shortly, promise :)

Today has been another awful day weather-wise, so I still haven’t been able to photograph Glastonbury! I’m a bit gutted, as I would really like to share it with you! The trouble with indoors here is that there really isn’t a suitable spot for staging the photos, and also as this place is a barn conversion, there are limited windows for getting good light. So photos will have to wait :(

I’m also extremely upset about another development. I have mentioned once or twice that we have a Big Trip coming up. I haven’t described it, as I was going to wait until nearer the time, but this trip was a really BIG deal, once in a lifetime kind of trip. I had a dreadful year last year with all kinds of devastating setbacks in various areas of my life. I was a real wreck – and it was during this period that I first starting blogging, to help me to keep a grip on things and to focus on the good things a bit. 

This Big Trip was the payoff for everything I’d been through. The thing I would think about when I couldn’t cope anymore, “all this is so terrible, but at least I have my Big Trip to look forward to. After the Big Trip I will feel so much better, and these other awful things will pale into insignificance compared to this experience.”  

And today I had to cancel the Big Trip. 

We realised that there just wasn’t time to fit in all of the prep for the Trip, all of the prep for moving to Australia, and seeing the people who are important to us. Something simply had to give. I know we picked the right thing to ditch, but I feel as though along with the disappointment for this Trip, all of those other feelings of deep unhappiness that the Trip was keeping at bay have come rushing back to overwhelm me.

I can’t tell you how devastated I feel. I know that a Big Trip is pretty self-indulgent, and I honestly feel like an awful human being for being so miserable about this when there are people out there who don’t have enough to eat, or who cannot go to school without being in danger, or who have to cope with much worse health problems than me. But I can’t change how important this was to me, and how devastating it feels to be once again missing out on some hard earned experience that means the world to me, and that I can never make up for.

I’m not trying to be a misery-guts by telling you all this, it’s just that partly I feel the need to get it off my chest, and partly I am aware that my miserable mood is permeating everything else I do right now, so I am finding myself totally unable to do an appropriate write-up of anything else…

So instead of writing anything much, here are some random pictures I have taken over the past months that make me chuckle, even if only slightly ;)

Who knew the Metro had the secret of eternal life?

Genuine screenshot from my personal Facebook newsfeed...

The last photo is from near where I used to live, and it always put the Wombles song in my head... :)